A serviceable zombie movie whose hook is its communist Cuban setting. The characters refer to the undead as dissidents and Yankee imperialists all while trying to make a buck as zombie killers. The plot meanders from one encounter to the next and doesn’t really amount to much more than that. There is a little bit of character stuff near the end, but much of the film is a lost opportunity to comment on life in Cuba, good or bad.
I am hesitant to call this a giallo even though it often appears on lists of the genre’s films. There is a minor mystery here, but this is mostly three bikini clad characters milling about on a rocky shore, swimming back and forth to their boat, and hooking up with a hunky fugitive. There is some stylish costuming, but about the most this has going for it. The story is beyond boring. Nothing makes sense until the last five minutes and even the twist is dumb and pointless.
Two hippies prance across Italy spreading peace and love while selling naked photos to finance their debauchery. After getting in trouble with the law, they go on the run and end up pulling into a country mansion looking for money. The woman of the house is initially antagonistic, but she soon joins into the swinging 60s fun. That is, until things get all murdery. Despite the title, there is no horror here and, aside from the hedonism, no thrills. The movie is colorful and groovy but the plot feels like an afterthought in which the characters could do any of a thousand things to get themselves out of the predicament they are in but always do the dumbest thing possible. Stupid hippies.
The Talos Principle is a solid puzzle game in which you manipulate objects around rooms to connect light beams, stack object, etc. in order to get to a prize. The more prizes you collect, to more puzzle zones are available. All the while there are tons of terminals with messages to read that try to world build and pose philosophical ponderings about consciousness. In the end, I really couldn’t care less about the “story” and I eventually just gave up about halfway through the game. The puzzles started to get too tedious and a wall of text was not a good enough reward for success.
One would think that a meta movie about horror director Lucio Fulci being overwhelmed by the gruesome images he films and then hallucinating about becoming a murderer himself would be a surefire hit. Unfortunately, this one just drags on and gets repetitive after about the second death. It does have quite a bit of the usual fake close-up gore, but that’s about it.
The Big Gundown is a top-tier spaghetti western that has a similar plot structure to Tuco’s story in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. Lee Van Cleef is hunting down a charismatic and wily Mexican outlaw only to come to question his own brutal ways. The story may be simple, but the characters are enjoyable and the pacing is very good. If you are keeping record, this is the Italian western that features a gun vs. knife showdown.
There was so much mud in this movie it made me uncomfortable. C’mon guys, wipe you feet before you saunter into the saloon dragging your coffin. Despite the exaggerated violence, this Italian western doesn’t quite rise to the heights of a Dollars movie (really, what can?). The red-hooded villains are a nice touch and, of course, the machine gun too, but there is something off about the acting and plotting that kept it from being great instead of good.
In Baba Yaga a young photographer gets mesmerized by the magic of an older witch. She is gradually lured into Baba Yaga’s world through a killer camera and an S & M themed American Girl doll. This doesn’t really play as a horror movie. With its stylized look and tone, this feels more like an art house movie… sorry, film. There’s enough story here to stay engaged but it never really makes a solid statement or, at the very least, provides any sort of scares. I think it is best appreciated as an exercise in mild cinematic style (and nudity).
Sergio Leone’s debut was the only film of his that I hadn’t yet seen. It’s a sword and sandals epic about a group of rebels hoping to overthrow the king of Rhodes but then the Phoenicians get involved and all Hades breaks loose. Not much of Leone’s trademark style is on display here. You start to get a sense of his love for wide vistas but that’s about it. I do have to say that, compared to other Italian sword and sandal pictures, this one has relatively good pacing and story telling. As much as I love the style of Bava’s Hercules movies, they could be pretty tedious.
A 70s gangster film from Italy starring Christopher Mitchum, son of Robert Mitchum. He looks like a spindly and weak version of his dad and has no acting chops whatsoever. The plot is your basic revenge story and the only twist here are a few moments of excessive, Fulci-level gore. A better lead actor would have elevated this to a classic, but Mitchum the younger sucks.
